Sure moms deserves some extra attention, right?

Only a few people are as vulnerable as mothers. 

Mothers must stand aside, behind, and above, without actually being able to do anything. They have to stand and watch as Barbie dolls are replaced with mobile phones or when the girlfriends get replaced with boyfriends. When their teenage daughters return home late at night, drenched in the scent of cigarette smoke and beer breath; that always means trouble and fights:
“Therese, come here and let me smell your breath”
“But I just had a sip of a beer, and the cigarette smell is because everybody around me smoked, WHAT ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO? JUST GO? NO WAY! Leave me alone.”

And that continues... Everything goes really badly for a few years years. Then it flattens out a bit... Things gets better, they are not yet entirely undisturbed, but still relatively relaxed. 
And suddenly, IT happens. 
I WANT TO BE WITH MY MOTHER. 
What? 
Well, I really want to sit at home with my mom on a Friday night, on the couch, with my feets in her knees, with a typical ‘mom music’ in the background (you know, the kind of music that you hated, but now thinks is really good).

The world is quieter and you feel that everything will work out for you. That is what your mom says at least, and you believe it. From the claim that my mom does not know me, to call mom and ask, “what do you think about it, really?” If mom says this is so, then it is so. 

My mother probably did not know that when, as a teenager, I yelled at her “you're ruining my life, what the hell have I done to you?” I still thought she was the best. That’s what I told people, even when I was 14. Because she was there, and she still is. 

Sometimes I find myself to behave in the same way as my mother, especially when I talk on the phone to someone that I want to make a good impression on. I then speak with a sweet, soft voice. It used to make me crazy when my mom did it, yet I now do the same thing myself. And when I do it, I get  a little satisfied with myself “Mom would have said the same thing, so it must be good”.

Given that it is Mother’s Day on Sunday, I would like to dedicate this short story to my mom because she’s my favourite woman. Smart, strong, wise, beautiful, cool, stubborn, funny and awesome are just some of the adjectives that comes to my mind when I think of her. 

My mother means everything to me. Sure we’ve had our battles and so on, but in the ‘big picture’, I feel that we are closer than ever today. Thanks for being there for me mom, I love you!

You are the world's best mom because...

... you are always there for me.
... you support me in difficult moments.
... you believe in me.
... you helped me with my homework.
... you cook the best lasagnes.
... you love me even when I don't deserve it.
... you held me when I was afraid of the dark.
... you've given me a wonderful childhood!
... you always wish me well!
... you comforted me when I was little and sad.
... you comfort me, even today!
... you taught me how to eat. 
... you taught me to never start a fight but always fight back.
... you taught me how to drive.
... you taught me SO much about life!
... you are YOU!

Love you Mom!!!

Work = No stupid thoughts

Of course I work to make money. And to have fun. But I find that I also go to work to not have to think about the questions that don’t have any answers to.

Everyone hope that some day, they will find and get the job they love, the ‘dream job’. A job where you own a lot of money and at the same time use your skills and love it. But because a lot of people don’t have their dream job, there has to be several reasons to why we work.

A couple of months ago I sat in my couch and looked at a Norwegian television show called ‘Skavlan’. Alain de Botton, an English philosopher who wrote “The Pleasures and Sorrows of Work” was the guest at the show. During that time, he talked about why we work.

From hard-work to desire

In the past we have been working to make money. To go to work wasn’t supposed to be a pleasure or a way to improve and grow as a person. You were considered lucky if you had a job that wasn’t unbearable, and that gave enough money to feed all your family members’ stomachs.

But in the 1700s, people changed the perception of work. From just being a necessary thing to do, it suddenly became a meaning of self-realisation and spiritual nourishment. As Alain de Botton said in the show, the same thing happened to love. The marriage would no longer be a practical arrangement, but something that would give us the passion and understanding.

I personally recognise myself in the description of the self-realisation description. I want to be creative at work. Be able to do something that feels good and be able to use my talents. I am fortunate to do so in my work. But if you don’t have that, why do you work?

It is probably to find a meaning in life. Alain de Botton says that the meaning is found among a lot of things when you do something that is beneficial to others. Nobody wants to be a ‘parasite’ that lives on the efforts of others, without self-help. Because then you will feel guilty and start feeling self-loathing.

When people complain that their job is boring and does not feel meaningful, it is a sign that they don’t understand what significance it has for others. They are also apparently not aware that they are creating something they value.  Alain de Botton argues that it is increasingly common that people think the job seems pointless. And that is probably a management culture issue. Companies want to have productive staff, but nowadays, you cannot whip people to get them to work harder, as they did in the 1700s. No, nowadays people have to feel desire to work for wanting to perform well. Whether the job is boring or not. It is now the manager’s job to make people feel that the work they do is important for anyone. A difficult task for you as a manager.

You don’t have to think

Finally, the most surprising reason for why we work. According to Alain de Botton, we work to avoid thinking. We humans are here on earth for a very short time. Around this fact raises many concerns. Why am I, such a small person as myself, doing in this vast universe? Soon enough we will all be equally compressed as a fossil in a museum, as Alain de Botton described it. This type of thinking can do so that it spins in the brain of anyone!

I remember when I was little, I though about how the universe was. So big and without an end, I was told. I could not believe that though, everything will of course end somewhere. That idea led to the next question: what’s behind it?

You get it, because there was no end, either did my questions about the universe.

As an adult I don’t think about this anymore. But I have a few friends who don’t work. They have some ‘crazy’ thoughts sometimes. I kind of envy them for the time that they have, but when I heard Alain de Botton, I am grateful for the job that I have. My friends are a lot more anxious that I am.

So thank you dear job for your help. I cannot say that you are perfect. But I get paid,  I feel useful and I have a lot of fun while working!  But above all, I don’t have any annoying thoughts that have no answer. I don’t think about the universe's end anymore. I am too busy reading and writing emails, organise, serve and run events!